Anxiety Is…

Anxiety is automatically waking up at 5 am because you assumed your 6 am alarm clock didn’t go off.
It’s checking your watch to determine how much time you could get if only you could just fall back asleep.

“Is it 5:15, only?”

It’s wanting to get that extra hour back knowing that you’ll be exhausted if you don’t.

“If I don’t get another hour, I might be irritable at work today, and I can’t be irritable because we have that team meeting.”

It’s not being able to fall back asleep because your mind is racing a mile a minute

“Speaking of the team meeting, remember the last one where you weren’t paying attention, and your boss was asking you a question?”

It’s planning out how your day is going to look even though you haven’t brushed your teeth yet.

“But If I wake up now that means I can get to work a little early, which might look good in my boss’s eyes.”

It’s staring at the ceiling in the warmth of your bed dreading the day already knowing people will notice that you’re tired

“Making a mental note to put on makeup when I get to work… did I put that in my bag already? UGH, I forgot to look for that eyeliner for my co-worker!”

It’s already feeling guilty over something that tiny.
It’s going back and forth from checking the time to planning your day.

“What time should I go to bed tonight to hopefully avoid this tomorrow?”

It’s realizing it’s unavoidable.
It’s getting up because it’s 6 am now, time to start the day.

night owl

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